Posted in meditation

Reacting and Responding

When we have any kind of experience or sensation, we usually immediately react. We react without thinking or deciding how to respond. We have a lot of autopilot responses that just sort of happen. So sometimes things bother us because we expect them to. If you’ve ever met someone who reminds you of someone else, you know what I’m talking about. We can get immediate feelings about someone and make all sorts of assumptions just because they remind us of someone else.

If we can learn how to stop and pay attention, we may come to a totally different feeling or action in response to something. Sometimes we don’t even know where our reactions come from. If we can learn to have a moment of pause, in between stimulus and response, then there’s a lot of freedom there. We can choose how we respond to things instead of being on autopilot all the time.

That’s part of what meditation is about. We want to find that pause. We want to take that moment to consider how to respond instead of just reacting all the time. With meditation we’re training our minds to see how they work. There is a lot of power in this.

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast The Kansas City Meditation Podcast

Posted in meditation

What Meditation Is Not

Many people have ideas about meditation.

I want to address some of those ideas that I think might be misconceptions. I’m doing that because many times I think people go to meditation events with certain expectations. Some ideas we associate with meditation are true and others are not. And some ideas may apply to some systems of meditation, but not the simple practices that I lead at Fountain City Meditation.

We do not chant secret words, we do not visualize magical things appearing, we do not pray or ask spirits to appear. And also we aren’t going to shave our heads or put on weird costumes. That’s not what we do, we’ll leave that to others.

We are training our minds to be fully present and to gain insight into our selves. The goals are attention and awareness. So, with that being said, I’m going to go over some common misconceptions.

  1. Meditation is just for relaxation: the issue here is with that word “just”. Relaxation is a part of this but it isn’t everything. Concentration, relaxation, and insight. This is about changing the way we interact with the world. If it was all relaxation, we’d just be going to sleep.
  2. Meditation is zoning out: There may be forms of meditation where this is true, but that’s not what we’re doing. If anything, it’s the opposite. We’re zoning in. We’re becoming more deeply involved in our experience, not going away from our experience.
  3. Meditation is mysterious and/or weird: I like to say I’m selling water by the river. It may not always be easy to talk about, especially if we’re thinking in terms of measurement or success, but it is about being where we already are. It’s all right here.
  4. Meditation is for people who are calm or spiritual: I think it’s for everyone. We can all improve our lives with this practice. There are no gatekeepers or prerequisites. If we think we have to have some measure of stability BEFORE we start a meditation practice, we’re probably never going to start.

 

So, those are some common misconceptions. It’s all here. Are you?

What are some other misconceptions you can think of?

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast The Kansas City Meditation Podcast

 

Posted in videos

Meditation and a Passive Attitude (video)

Sometimes it feels like our meditation is going really well. Other times it does not…

 

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast The Kansas City Meditation Podcast

Posted in videos

Q and A: Is Meditation Hard? (video)

I answered these questions:
Is Meditation Hard?
Why Don’t You Come Teach Meditation in my Church?
Do I Need “Official Teacher Training”?
Is Meditation Religious?

Do you have questions? Let me know!

 

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast The Kansas City Meditation Podcast

 

Posted in meditation, videos

Insight Meditation by Ram Dass (video)

These are Vipassana (Insight) Meditation instructions that were written by Ram Dass. Ram Dass passed away yesterday at the age of 88. He was a beloved spiritual teacher who wrote the books “Be Here Now” and “Be Love Now”. He said, “I want my life to be a statement of love and compassion and where it isn’t, that’s where my work lies.” Giving this guided meditation is my tribute to him. Go here for more: https://www.ramdass.org/meditation-2/

 

 

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind

Posted in meditation

Why Bother Meditating?

Meditation is challenging.

Anyone that tells you it’s easy is probably trying to sell you something. It takes time, energy, and determination. Often in life we feel like we have a shortage of these things. It’s tempting to avoid meditation. I could meditate, but I’d rather watch Netflix or sit and drink beer. These days it’s so easy to fill our time with many things that are either productive or pleasurable. We always have things to do. Is it worth our time to stop and do nothing for a little while?

Why should we spend our time meditating?

We do this because life and hard and it helps. Every one of us is a mess. We may think we are and some people aren’t, but we’re wrong. Everyone is a mess. We’re confused, we struggle to be happy, and we’re distracted. A lot of the time we’re just sleepwalking through life, missing everything. We have difficulty being fully present.

There is a way we can learn how to live our lives more fully. That what this is about. We’re trying to learn how to be more present and aware, to see more clearly, and to be more genuine. There is depth and clarity in our lives that we’re missing.

Sometimes we get stuck in an “if only” perspective. If only this or that was different, then I could be happy. That can easily steal all our joy. We have a pervasive mental habit of always wanting. We spend a lot of time labeling the world around us, putting things into categories to try to make sense of the world. Good, bad, boring, fun, etc. We put things in categories then decide how to react. And sometimes we don’t even know we’re making those judgments ourselves. When we call something bad we want to push it away. When we call something good, we want to try to hold on. We always have less power than we’d like to push and pull these things. No matter how hard we try to hold onto good, sometimes we can’t. No matter how hard we try to push away bad, sometimes we can’t. And when there’s nothing good or bad, we’re often bored. We have put ourselves in chains of grasping our likes and pushing our dislikes. We’ve put ourselves in chains but the truth is we have the key.

And we can improve that by seeing clearly.

Another thing we struggle with is change. Things are always changing when we want them to stay the same. Change is the nature of the universe. When we learn to pay attention to our minds we see that there’s plenty of change there too. Our thoughts come and go and lead to others thoughts, sometimes so fast that we  don’t even know how we got from one thought to another. People come and go in our lives. Good things come and go. Bad things come and go too. It’s all about change. And, of course, ultimately it becomes increasingly clear to us that we’re getting older. Our bodies are, slowly but surely, going too. Change is inevitable and hard to accept.

What it all comes down to is this. We are carried around by a subtle discontent that I call suffering. We can learn how to manage that by learning how our minds work and training them. We can learn how to recognize our desires and not be controlled by them. We can want or fear something without becoming unreasonable and/or obsessed.

Through meditation we learn to see how our minds work, then we can learn to see ourselves more clearly. That’s where the magic happens. When we see ourselves clearly we can really learn how to manage our suffering. Mental cultivation through consistent meditation practice is a powerful method transforming our relationships to ourselves and to the world. Meditation purifies our minds. It cuts through the baggage and the bullshit and shows us what’s really happening. This brings us clarity and helps us develop wisdom, mindfulness, and compassion. Meditation softens us and opens us up so we stop making enemies out of everything all the time. Meditation can make us deeply aware of the world and our place in it. Meditation also helps us sharpen our concentration so we can pay attention, really pay attention, and experience the world in a more full way.

Why meditate?

Because I want to live my best life. I want to see the world in a more clear and full way than I ever have before. We may not be able to add years to our lives, but we can add life to our years.

Why not try?

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Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind

Posted in buddhism, mindfulness

Taking Away From Our Lives

This life right now, in each moment, is all we really have. The past is gone and the future is only potential. We spend so much time not focused on the here and now, but we do have the power to change that.

We have a few ways that we tend to take away from the fullness of our lives. We take away from our lives by sleepwalking, just going through the motions of life without being present or acting with intention. This is where we just let things happen and we don’t really reflect on why we do the things we do. We also take away from the fullness of our lives by wishing. We pretty consistently don’t value where we are. To wish we were somewhere else is to take away from here. To wish to be entertained instead of doing nothing is to take away from doing nothing. There is value in doing nothing.

To give to our lives is to understand “good enough”. We are good enough. What we are doing is good enough. We’re trying to learn how to enter this moment completely without judgment, without hating our experience or wishing for something else.

We lose so much of our lives by dwelling on the past, obsessing about the future, or just wishing really hard that right now was different. But this is where we are. We might imagine our meditation practice taking us to some special place or giving us some magical experience. That’s not what happens. We’re training to be here. That’s it. It is completely ordinary.

When we’re fully present we can learn how to be content.


Want to come meditate with me? I’m at Ubuntu Village Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind

Posted in videos

Entering the Gate (video)

The path is sometimes called “the Gateless Gate”

The only thing stopping you is you.

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If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

Want to come meditate with me? I’m at HDKC Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind

Posted in buddhism, meditation

The Three Kinds of Laziness

Laziness is often what stops us from being consistent in our meditation practice. but also from anything else we might do for personal development or self care. Laziness is very common, probably something we all struggle with in one way or another. It’s a powerful force that gets in our way and regularly stops us from working toward our goals.

In Buddhism we sometimes talk about different kinds of laziness. It’s said that laziness comes in 3 different forms. I call them Procrastination, Feeling Unworthy, and Busyness. These are the things that keep us stuck and I think just identifying and being aware of them helps us manage them.

Procrastination is what we normally associate with the word laziness. I want to avoid inconvenience. I’ll do it later. I want to stay in bed. We can come up with all sorts of excuses to avoid doing things. I need to wait for the right time to meditate. I would meditate now but I don’t feel like it today. We’ve all had thoughts like this. You know what happens if you wait until you feel like it to meditate? You just don’t do it. This is all rooted in comfort. If we’re comfortable in the situation we’re in now, then we’re reluctant to change it. This not only stops us from achieving our goals but it also can limit our experience of the world.

Feeling Unworthy is when we don’t try because we feel like we can’t do something. When people find out I teach meditation sometimes they say things like, “I wish I could meditate, but I’m just not stable and calm enough.” It comes from a place of thinking that other people can do it and you can’t. This kind of laziness occurs in all sorts of ways. We might not apply for a promotion because we think we aren’t qualified. Or we might not ask someone out because we think we’re not good enough for them. We might not create art or write because we think we aren’t skilled enough. This is all rooted in hopelessness and ignoring our potential. Whatever the thing is, we should try to do it and see what happens.

Busyness doesn’t seem like a form of laziness at first, so I have to unpack it. There’s one aspect of this that’s an excuse and another aspect that’s sort of true. “I don’t have time to meditate.” “My life is too active.” These are lies. You may not have time to go to meditation classes, but if you have time to breathe, you have time to meditate. We use this for other things too. Anything we do that’s to better ourselves, we can convince ourselves we don’t have time, whether that’s meditation, working out, spending quality time with your family, or whatever else. You have time. But the other aspect is this. We fill our time in unexpected ways. Social media has us glued to our phones and we’d be shocked if we really measured how much time we spend scrolling. Phones are the busyness of our era. We fill our times with scrolling through apps and for most of us it doesn’t even really bring us joy. Most of social media is either boring or frustrating.

We need to remember to make time for self care and personal development. We could all manage our time better. We have to make time for quiet and to be present. So let’s see if we can challenge our laziness.

 


If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

Want to come meditate with me? I’m at HDKC Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind

Posted in fountain city meditation, videos

Face Whatever Appears Before You (video)

This is talk was recorded at Fountain City Meditation on 9/30/19.

The meditation is 29 minutes and the talk is 7 minutes.

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If you’d like to support my work, please consider making a donation.

Want to come meditate with me? I’m at HDKC Monday nights at 7pm. Meditation Practice, Support, and Encouragement. 4327 Troost, Kansas City, MO.

Visit my YouTube Channel to hear  Talks!

And go check out my Podcast Scharpening the Mind